I have often thought that we get angry as parents because we want the child. for example, to tidy their room a bit and then we plan to have a treat. Then they don't do it, so I.offer that as a bribe. Then they don't do it, and the bribe becomes a boundary. Then they don't do it and the boundary becomes a threat. They still don't do it. And we're angry. Not because the room's still a mess, but because they have effectively enabled me to back myself into a corner where i have to lay down the law, be mean and basically I feel tricked and cheated into.a place where i can't see myself as a 'nice mummy'. I'm now a harridan and I'm furious that I did that to myself. Or something like that.
I have often thought that we get angry as parents because we want the child. for example, to tidy their room a bit and then we plan to have a treat. Then they don't do it, so I.offer that as a bribe. Then they don't do it, and the bribe becomes a boundary. Then they don't do it and the boundary becomes a threat. They still don't do it. And we're angry. Not because the room's still a mess, but because they have effectively enabled me to back myself into a corner where i have to lay down the law, be mean and basically I feel tricked and cheated into.a place where i can't see myself as a 'nice mummy'. I'm now a harridan and I'm furious that I did that to myself. Or something like that.